On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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