I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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