Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1048 609 share tweet
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
