How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Randomize