no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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