Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Randomize
