Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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