i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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