Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize