I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
