but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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