I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
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