Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
