I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
i love accidental penises.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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