I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
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