Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
