no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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