you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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