Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
why do cheetos always look like penises
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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