bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
