his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
