careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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