i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
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