i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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