Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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