And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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