i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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