i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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