Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
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