I'm laying in your front yard are you home
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
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