i always forget guys have bellybuttons
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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