dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
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