you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize