she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
