he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Randomize
