dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Girls should come with a carfax report
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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