No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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