considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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