I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize