and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Randomize
