eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
