So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Randomize
