You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Houston, we have a blender
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Randomize
