Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
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