Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize