Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?