butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
