fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
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