this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
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My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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