I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad