he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Randomize
