I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I queefed so loud it echoed.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Randomize
